That one in particular hurt a lot, because I had almost killed myself bending over backwards to provide the Hello Summer Vacation Tropical Flamingo shirt I was providing for him- paying 80% of everything, 3 cooked meals a day when I worked full time and he was suspended from work for terrible behavior towards others and his boss. Cleaning up after him, doing his washing. And now, I was doing everything in my power and draining myself financially to assist him in prison. When this particular visit ended, he nonchalantly and rather cheerfully said ”see ya!”, and started walking away without even a hug. The guards looked at me in pity, and my capacity to tolerate humiliation at this point had hit the roof. I drove home but didn’t make it far before I had to pull over on the highway, I absolutely lost it and sobbed and sobbed and sobbed deeply. At that moment, there was a physical sensation, it was like my chest cavity split open all the way to my head, and I became dual minded. I had 2 heads. A part of me was thinking ”he needs help!”, but the other half, for the first time ever, said ”you don’t actually need to put up with this”.
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